Busting Out of the Box

canstockphoto1748268Before we can live outside of the lines, we have to bust out of the box.

But how did we get in here, anyway?

Sometimes we allow others to put us in a box — through labels, titles, and credentials; by allowing other people’s expectations to create (self) limiting beliefs and perceptions about who we are and what we are capable of — measuring our inner worth by outer means.

But sometimes our boxes, lines and sand traps are built from within, reenforced with fear and covered with pride.

Perhaps we dwell on past failures, struggles or circumstances beyond our control.  We focus on the problem(s) instead of creating solutions, allowing our ‘excuses’ to define who we are.

Sometimes we become dependent on past successes, too, for often the by-products of our success become the very trappings that define who we are.  In the fight to hold on, we chase the illusions and stop living in the flow of our lives.

To break out of a box, you must first break down walls — for walls that were built to protect us from others often divide and separate, while walls that were built to protect us from ourselves, often disconnect us from the very essence of who we are.

Suspend beliefs.  Reframe.  Redefine.

Play.  Create.  Wonder.  Dream.

Be bold, take risks and allow yourself to become a possibility thinker, erasing the lines of limitations.

Bust our of your box to become the fullest expression of who you are.

I’m curious:  Have you ever felt ‘trapped’ in a box, whether personally or professionally? What role have you played in creating your own box?  What role have personal or societal norms and values played in creating the box?  What advice would you give to others who are trying to break out of their own proverbial box?  

5 thoughts on “Busting Out of the Box

  1. To satisfy curiosity,
    I had a master’s degree in Higher Education in ’76 and a half a year of psychology at the graduate level in Personality Theories and Therapies, and Counseling Theories and Therapies. I would have been a college instructor through professor, and maybe the chairperson oif a department of psychology over the last 32 years. I had a genetic defect from my mom and/or dad that gave me a condition that is similar to the experience of psychological trauma associated with a terrible event, such as the loss of the life of a child or spouse, for examples,.
    I played no role in my disorder; it was genetics, although some in my family would disagree out of what I see as sibling rivalry. Biology makes me experience these tremendous painful feelings and there are no reasons or the feelings! When it happens the first time to many people, they think they will never get over it. This is the fear of the genetically depressed person. “Will this pain I feel no matter whether things are happy or not ever going to go away?!
    Anxiety worsens to greater degrees and becomes a state of misery, interfering with someone’s’ attempts to live a happy life. Sometimes torment occurs over a period of time as anguish, like that of a loved one lost, occurs, and leads to a state of torment, as agony sometimes rises up. There’s excruciating pain of many kinds and torture. I lived from May 1979 unit today in a lot of the realm of torment – anguish and sometime torment for 4 months at a time each year.

    What works best? I use an eclectic approach to understanding and multidisciplinary approach to problem. I use a multimodal approach. Whatever theory and therapy best fits the disorder, the better the chances are that the related therapeutic approach will work.

    Love, work, play, rest, sleep, and enjoy our many psychological senses!

    Horace Winston Crosby Jr.,M.Ed.


  2. Create, wonder, dream – aren’t those disallowed for adults? Wow, where do lose that spirit? A great way I heard a concept like this was – if you had a billion dollars, what would you do? Try that. Think big – Act Bigger (heard on a Success Magazine interview).


    1. EXACTLY! 🙂 We lose confidence in our dreams when we lose touch with our voice, often giving our inner power away to others or to our own fears and doubts. But it’s never too late to reclaim it!

      I also believe many of us, especially women, are hard-wired to nurture others before ourselves or live with real challenges that constrain our ability to fully live our lives out loud. But sometimes all that is needed is a subtle shift in our perspective. By simply giving ourselves permission to once again dream, create, and wonder, we are often able to find everyday ways to live out the fullest expression of who we authentically are — reclaiming joy in our lives while giving those we love a priceless gift in return.


  3. Sometimes I think people don’t really know me, and, if they did, would they like me? In the end, we are alone, but for our Creator and the Lover of Our Soul. Great comfort, that!


    1. Georgia – I think we have all struggled at one point or another with this question – some of us perhaps more than others. Too often, in our desire to feel understood and accepted by others, we end up trading pieces of our authentic self, which is really the greatest gift we have to offer the world. Like you, I find comfort in my Faith and in reconnecting with myself so that I might better serve others.

      We may not every fully know you as you know yourself, but to my eyes you are a beautiful soul!



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